Recently it has been increasingly difficult for me to write. I have found it extremely challenging to quiet the chaos in my mind and follow a train of thought through to the finish. Weeks ago, the world came to what felt like a standstill in the wake of this pandemic, giving me what should be a perfect time to shut myself in my room and write. Alas, every time I removed myself from distraction and tried to quiet myself, I felt more overwhelmed and distracted than ever. In fact, the thought of sitting in silence, alone with my thoughts, scared me.
I have been caught in a storm. This isn’t a sit by the window and watch kind of storm, I absolutely love those. This is a hold on for dear life, I’m in a small boat in the ocean, and I can’t see past these waves kind of storm. The kind of storm that rips the steering wheel from your hands and leaves you adrift and terrified. I have been scurrying about, securing all the things in my life’s boat that I don’t want to lose. Things like my free time, video game time, sleep time, and countless other things I am scared to lose to the storm. I still find myself in the storm on the same boat, its a good thing I tied that stuff down for when the boat sinks, huh? This storm has me grasping for control, latching onto things under my influence. Thats the thing with storms though, they are the result of powers far beyond our reach. No amount of steering or securing this dinky little boat is going to deliver you from a storm. But there is one who can deliver me from this storm.
In all of my scurrying and panicking I almost forgot He was on the boat with me. “Where did He go though? Why was he not helping me secure and steer the boat? I’m in the middle of a freaking storm and He is nowhere to be seen!” All of these things crossed my mind as I went below deck to find Him. And find Him I did. He was sleeping peacefully in the stern, seemingly unaware of the storm raging around Him. I felt so confused, He always knew the right thing to do, in every situation, and now in the most urgent of situations, He was unable to be bothered. I shook Him awake, and his eyes opened so peacefully that I forgot my life was in danger at all. A wave rocked the boat, and my fear resurfaced as I accused Him of leaving me to die. He asked me why I was so afraid as He stood and brought the storm raging around me to a halt.
Who’s in the boat? Are you weathering your storms with Jesus? Jesus has invited me and he is inviting you to rest with Him in the midst of your storms. Next time the storms of life leave you feeling helpless and abandoned, just remember that Jesus is in the boat. The one the wind and waves obey is in the boat. You will weather the storm.
Jesus was sleeping at the back of the boat with his head on a cushion. The disciples woke him up, shouting, “Teacher, don’t you care that we’re going to drown?”
When Jesus woke up, he rebuked the wind and said to the waves, “Silence! Be still!” Suddenly the wind stopped, and there was a great calm.
Then he asked them, “Why are you afraid? Do you still have no faith?” -Mark 4:38-40